Zoned Out

Being in a place, that's not on this planet.
Zoning out, in my own world.
That's what I seem to do best.
Just sit and stare and feel numb.
Feeling nothing at all.
And I don't care.
Because all I want to do is just sit.
Things are going round in my head.
I analyze things but get nowhere.
But I'm fine with that.
I'm in no fit state to figure out anything logically.
At that moment I don't want to move.
Not one muscle in my body.
I then feel light sensations in my forehead.
It's a glorious feeling.
At that moment, I don't care what happens.
I don't want to think about normal life.
Or about daily things happening.
It doesn't seem important.
I'd be happy to never be disturbed.
I'm in a state of being indescribable.
How does it occur and when?
To me it's a mystery.
I don't know what triggers it.
And I don't know why it happens.
But I enjoy it.


If I knew what was really going on in my brains for me to get into this state of being, I would more than likely never want to feel like that again. It can't be healthy. So why do I enjoy it? Where does it come from, and will it occur less and less gradually, as I recover?
Questions, questions and more questions.. I hope to one day find the answer.
But until then, I will enjoy the moments or hours that I spend in my own world.