Reflection of both inside & outside

The way I look is bad
The way I feel is bad
Are they balanced?
Are they equals?
Do I feel as bad as I look
Do I look as bad as I feel
Does my outside make me feel worse on the inside?
Does my inside make me look worse on the outside?

Does one strengthen the other?
Does one wear the other down?
Feeling better will make me look better.
Looking better will make me feel better.
That explains why I cannot bear the sight of myself.
That explains why I feel like I'm rotten and old.
It should clarify what I'm dealing with.
It should clarify why I'm down in the dumps.

Some days I will have a look.
Other days I refuse.
Seeing what I want to see.
Believing that what I see isn't me.
Fooling myself I'm on top of the world.
Fooling myself I look fit and healthy.
Needing to realize that I am that person.
Needing to realize that I am that reflection, it IS Niamh.